In the Pursuit of Lentils

In the fall of 2001, I had lentils that changed my life. Ever since then I've been chasing these lentils, trying to recreate the savory, satisfying amalgamation of garlic and tomato with undertones of .... je ne sais quois.


I first tasted them in Spain. They were made by a woman who never professed to be a good cook. After I had my first bite and was like YOU HAVE TO GIVE ME THIS RECIPE, she told me nonchalantly "Oh, there is no recipe. You put lentils, then water, then one whole garlic head, one whole good tomato, one whole onion, a bay leaf, salt and pepper, water to cover, cook for an hour, spices at the end. Oh, and you need a ham bone, of course."

Of course, a ham bone.

The following eight years found me trying to make these lentils, and failing. They were never good enough. They never even came close to the Spanish lentils. Of course, Spaniards have a way with garlic, tomatoes, and pork. You must admit. Maybe I was chasing a pot of gold at the end of the rainbow.

Except! I think I've done it! For some reason I never got that savory, salty flavor I needed from American ham bones (?). I also tried bacon, pepperoni, and good old baked ham. Meh. It was alright, but not good enough. Not even close.

This time I used pancetta. PANCETTA, internets, it worked!! And I'm certain you could recreate these, too, because my plain old grocery store sells pancetta at the deli counter, so I bet yours would, too! No fancy ingredients here. I just asked for 4 slices, kinda thick. I think it cost $3.50. Then you need a bag of lentils (you'll only use half) at $0.90, 6 c. of liquid (I did 4 c. chicken stock, 2 water, for a cost of $2.50), a big can of diced tomatoes at $1.40, 3 cloves of garlic, half a large onion at $0.55, some olive oil, and salt+pepper. What I'm trying to say is this is CHEEEEEAP. And GOOOOOOD. Really good. Splurge on a fancy loaf of bread because you'll want it come supper time!!

Directions:

Clean and sort lentils.

Mince 3 cloves of garlic, dice the onion. You want to sweat the garlic and onion in EVOO for 5-6 minutes, then add diced pancetta. Cook for ~8 minutes. Add everything else (wait to add the salt, though, until the very end... you need to taste it first to avoid oversalting because of the pancetta). I moved the entire mixture to my slow cooker, and cooked on high for 1 hour and low for 3-4 hours.

This is important: this dish is excellent. However, you need to make it ahead of time because the flavor EXPLODES if you serve it one or two days later (two is best). Seriously. Explodes. Insane. In your mouth. If you want to be uber-healthy, add some fresh baby spinach leaves to the hot lentils and let them wilt in your bowl. I can practically hear Dr. Oz applauding you for your healthy food choices.

Lentils. Who knew? (That Spanish lady, that's who).

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